via my wonderful, yet Visual Basic-programming ;-) husband, John
If restaurants functioned like Microsoft...
Server: Hi, my name is Bill, and I'll be your Support Server. What seems to be the problem?
Patron: There's a fly in my soup!
Server: Try again, maybe the fly won't be there this time.
Patron: No, it's still there.
Server: Maybe it's the way you're using the soup; try eating it with a fork instead.
Patron: Even when I use the fork, the fly is
Server: Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl; what kind of bowl are you using?
Patron: A SOUP bowl!
Server: Hmmm, that should work. Maybe it's a configuration problem; how was the bowl set up?
Patron: You brought it to me on a saucer; what
has that got to do with the fly in my soup?!
Server: Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the fly in your soup?
Patron: I sat down and ordered the Soup of the
Server: Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the Day?
Patron: You have more than one Soup of the Day
Server: Yes, the Soup of the Day is changed every hour.
Patron: Well, what is the Soup of the Day now?
Server: The current Soup of the Day is tomato.
Patron: Fine. Bring me the tomato soup and the
check. I'm running late now.
[Server leaves and returns with another bowl of soup and the check.]
Server: Here you are, Sir. The soup and your check.
Patron: This is potato soup.
Server: Yes, the tomato soup wasn't ready yet.
Patron: Well, I'm so hungry now, I'll eat anything.
Patron: Server! There's a gnat in my soup!
Soup of the Day $5.00
Upgrade to newer Soup of the Day $2.50
Access to support $1.00
"We are Microsoft. Resistance Is Futile. You Will Be Assimilated."